Hot Fuss

An American Fairytale

2010-08-06T11:02:00.000-07:00

Parts of an essay I wrote in class on the American dream, a project that also required an art element. I created a series of panels of photographs I had taken in SF in throughout 2010 combined with quotes from specific songs and titled "An American Fairytale" to illustrate my interpretation of the dream. Please note that some of my photos have not been included in this post

An American Fairytale

"You may say I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one." Words spoken by a famous non American who knew the dreams of many, and witnessed the American dream for himself. There is only so much that can be written and said about the American dream. It is something that must be experienced, felt, and seen to be fully understood. Even then, understanding does not bring realization and some dreams are never fulfilled. A dream is different to each imagination, but the idiosyncrasies and common ideals that built our nation from the beginning is present in each one. People from all over the world see grandeur and wealth in the American vision, obvious prosperity - but underneath that typical, shining gold standard is something much more. "A better life" is the most common definition of the American dream, but what does that mean? What must we do in order to actually live it? We want to believe that dreams come true, and that fairytales can be real. To me, the American dream is "An American Fairytale," a story containing this country's life images in colour, light, and dark.

"To the centre of the city, where all roads meet, waiting for you." In this situation, this is meant to mean that the person chasing the American dream has traveled many roads to reach a destination where they believe is the place of all their hopes and dreams. The first panel of photographs takes its title and caption from lyrics in Joy Division's "Shadowplay". The band themselves hail from the industrial English city of Manchester, in the social turmoil of the '70s and '80s, while these photos were taken in San Francisco of May 2010. Ian Curtis' lyrics are also tinged with a quiet desperation that can be felt in the photos. Despite whatever cultural difference, a number of parallels can be made with the photographs and the words they were combined with.

The first photo depicts an enter sign for an old hotel, where our American fairytale will begin. The hotel represents America with its age and the connotation behind the word. According to most people, hotels are supposed to be "fancy, luxurious" and "expensive." Like the Statue of Liberty, it is a symbol that welcomes people to a new place, and like America - it is not always what people expect it to be.

The following photo is that of a middle aged woman I passed by on the San Francisco streets, streets walked on by American dreamers all the time. Except many of these dreamers were dressed in beautiful designer clothes, with eyes looking at life through expensive Chanel eyewear. Somehow, they did not see this woman with poor and dirty clothing so different from theirs, and hunger written so plainly on a cardboard sign in front of her.

Below is a similar scene - a homeless man with his meager belongings in a box sleeping on some steps with a stunning vintage Mercedes-Benz in the foreground. The contrasting scenarios of wealth and status versus the ostracized poor shows us the harsher realities.

In between the two photos is a black and white picture of "one way only." This refers to how society views that in the American dream, we can only follow one road - the road that ends in prosperity, or the road with a dead end. It is also meant to symbolize the perseverance one must possess to reach wherever they're headed. "But I could only stare in disbelief as the crowds all left." Obviously, there is selfishness, apathy and indifference where that fabled American dream doesn't quite flourish like we imagine it to, and even where it does. The panel expresses dual meanings - the indifference we might have towards those who are living a life opposite that of the ideal, and the darker side of the American dream.

U2 wrote "In God's Country," during their American inspired phase of music, appropriately describing the photographs in this panel. Freedom of religion is cherished dearly by millions of Americans. It is well known that the the very origins of this country came from the simple pursuit of freedom of faith. In contrast to the religious motifs essential to the American dream, the series begins with an atheistic man proclaiming his personal happiness with the lack of a religion, boldly on his chest. Although the majority of the country is Christian, other religions and atheism are strongly another part of the faith theme in America. American laws and our culture as a whole has been heavily influenced by Christianity, both beneficially and in terrible hurtful ways. The photo of candles lit in the dark paints this half and half dichotomy. Many Americans will tell you that their faith keeps them strong, and perhaps even sane, in the fast paced modern world. Others will tell you that religion confined their lives. And while our nation prides themselves on being open minded, bigots and hypocrites parade under a devotion banner. It is American Christianity that has also been stereotyped, mocked, and even commercialized - as seen in the church sign photo. The last picture is of a Buddhist monk with a look of simple serenity, illustrates the peace that religion brings to some people - despite the problems it does create. "Everyday the dreamers die, see what's on the other side." We believe what we choose to believe. We can't deny that there are Christians who think that atheist/Muslim/etc. beliefs won't last like their own, and use their side as an 'example' of what is wrong. It is just as some others do the same for Christianity. America is wonderful (and not so wonderful), and unique in their adamant support of freedom of religion - while it is not perfect, it is a fundamental part of the American dream.

"The World We Live In" is an economy focused series of photos. The American dream is not completely about money, but a large part of it is intrinsic to it. As we cultivate our finances, we become ever so closer to the car or house of our dreams. On the other hand, by doing so, we also make it easier to stereotype the American dream as a simple aspiration to 'get rich.' There is more to it than pure materialism and greed, though it can be hard to see that past the dollar signs surrounding our daily lives. The first photo depicts a busy day at the New York Stock Exchange on the newspaper - a classic American image of the moneymaker. More money equates to more success in our society, though too commonly it pushes people to acquire it through lies and deceit. The bank pictured underneath brings to mind our current economy and its crisis. It can be interpreted to mean that dreams (like banks) sometimes fail, but it can remind us that the American dream is more than just about dollars. It is the last photo that might best express the complex nature of American capitalism in the dreams of a consumer driven society. A shopping window shows us what we want, and shows us ourselves in the reflection of the glass, metaphorically and physically. We all want a rags to riches fairytale, and we want to attain meaning through it. "I feel myself get tired. I still want something real. This is the world we live in." Dreams can be nothing, simply because they are intangible. Isn't a dollar bill just a piece of paper anyway? Material things may be the most tangible form of success, but they are not the most substantial. We are all aware of this, and this awareness is present in the American dream - through the blood, sweat and tears drained from the heart of every hard working American.

"Americana" opens with Lady Gaga in black and white on a magazine cover, a current international symbol of American culture. She is well known for her individuality, but her uniqueness can be questioned. Lady Gaga, like so much of American culture, sells sex. In that way, she conforms to society, especially American society's wants and needs. She is a picture of the successful American dream - simultaneously different and marketable. None of it came easily to her, she worked for her share, the way all dreamers must. Fittingly, the theme is extended in the grocery aisle. The variety and mass quantity we see in our supermarkets is characteristic of our American culture. The common iPod was placed in the panel as a symbol of the influence our culture has globally, and shared universal traits such as musicality, creativity and ingenuity. And no matter the country or location, everyone has an aspect of the American dream in themselves because the dream is composed of qualities that can be found in everyone.

"Glamorous Indie Rock n' Roll" was inspired by the same titled song from The Killers.

The first photo is of their Hot Fuss album, where much of the lyrics mentioned come from, is actually a direct acknowledgment of their influence in this project. When one thinks of American music - they bring up Bruce Springsteen, U2, or other classic rock bands. And yet, the Killers are probably the band with the most American convictions at the moment. They come from Las Vegas, a place of everything and nothing all at once.

Following the Killers is a necklace in black and white, made of glass not diamonds, to represent how the beauty of the American dream isn't true all of the time. There will always be someone ahead of you, or wealthier than yourself, which creates tension and jealousy.

Lastly, the black and white Prada photo illustrates commercial and personal freedom. By simply being able to walk into that Prada store is an expression of the American dream - one has the freedom and money enough to do so in this country. Perhaps not purchase anything, but we can afford to walk in. The whole panel is supposed to sum up the dazzling and rebellious spirit behind the American dream. "It's like a cigarette in the mouth, or a handshake in the doorway." We dream our lives to be beautiful and glamorous, yet we simultaneously fight the things we supposedly want such as fame and capitalism. The American dream is inextricably tied to materialism, but we manage to reject that notion at the same time. In countless different ways, Americans are bourgeois punks - another contradiction, and another irony of the dream.

"Perestroika" refers to the political and economical changes in the Soviet Union before the fall of Communism.....All through the difficult changes and transitions of the last decade, and the last, the country never let the American dream go. It is one of the few things in our nation that has actually remained immortal and for the most part, unchanged, in our constantly changing world of views and opinions...... Anyone...can have influence in our nation, and are fully capable of making a difference. "I've got soul, but I'm not a soldier." There is the obvious war in Iraq, and then there is the one that is always being fought at home - the fight for change and social issues.

"Under the Gun" targets current controversial issues that connect to the American dream. Immediately after the title is a homeless man asleep on a bench with the famous Obama campaign poster behind him.It goes to show that shattered dreams are as much an American reality as the dream itself. American dreams may have different origins, but they all amount to about the same thing - a better future. The topic of immigration seen in the third photo portrays the concept of how every single one of us is an immigrant. We go through our American life searching for ways to make our dreams real. It also provokes the thought that this land is "our land", yet it doesn't belong to us.....We might live in modern times, and convince ourselves that our society is equal, but it is not. The American dream's foundation is built on equality, but we still don't have that. "Panic on the streets of London. Panic on the streets of Birmingham. I wonder to myself will life ever be sane again?" It seems that whatever progress we make, as years go by and the American dream ages, part of society still doesn't move along with it.

"Everything Will Be Alright" is the last track on Hot Fuss, and lends its name to the final panel of pictures. It begins with two photos of students passing through class. They are the youth who go through each day carrying tomorrow in their minds and imaginations. Their aspirations, dreams and desires are the sames ones for tomorrow, but it is all lived in the present. As this quote on tumblr puts it, "Seize the day and put the least possible trust in tomorrow. FUCK THE FUTURE." (Very reminiscent of 70's UK punk's "There's no future.") And everyone goes through everyday routine,private trials and tribulations- despite whatever crisis the world is going through. The single most important trait in the American dream is simply hope. In every dream and every fairytale, there is belief that the world will be better because losing hope means losing your dreams. When there is nothing else, there is still hope to hold on to, to create and continue any meaning in a vision or a goal. It is for these reasons that the American dream has survived generation to generation.

The final two captures on the San Francisco streets complete the collection. One is looking straight ahead, across a street illuminated by sunlight, the view unclear but bright. The very last image is at a street corner of an unseen name, with the perspective looking up into a brilliant blue sky. Nothing is certain, not even in dreams, though the changes are up to us.

San Francisco, the Killers, and the odd British band or two, all combined, are not usually what comes into people's thoughts when you mention the American dream. However, I used them to represent the nuances and less often seen side of the American dream that cannot be fully expressed in an essay. The themes and ideas behind the American dream can be experienced in this small dimension for a few minutes through these people and that city, through images and choice words. In every fairytale, there is good and bad, battles are won and lost, and the anticipated ending is supposed to be what matters most. Was the dream accomplished, or crushed? Did they all live happily ever after? "An American Fairytale," is a theme that is supposed to portray the themes within the American dream, because of the congruency in their morals and ironies. It contains cynicism, as people can easily associate that with both these things. I realized more than ever that the American dream is a story composed of of all this - desperation, faith, blind greed, rise to power and rags to riches, glitter and dust, war, and good old fashioned values. It is part fairytale, part cliche, it remains to be truth and lies - and yet it couldn't be truer than it's own existence.

Drove Through Ghosts to Get Here

2010-08-06T01:18:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I still feel your ghost
drifting in the air
white noise particles coming apart in the fog
they glisten and perpetuate this silent feeling
in silver dust clouds
As I watch as I breathe
I see Monet colours gloss strangers' eyes

the fog pulls my thoughts together
brings back memories keeps them distant
like a lifelong dream this time this place
existing
yet unreal

Prada. Saks. Tiffany's.

2010-07-24T16:38:00.000-07:00

Prada, one of my favorites. I think Miuccia's best designs were when Sasha Pivovarova was the face. Someone commented that it had a "Breakfast at Tiffany's" feel.

Sak's Fifth Avenue. This one has got to be a "Pretty Woman" - Julia Robert shopping in Rodeo Drive moment. Another one of the photos I took in Union Square in San Francisco in May.

25 days of summer left. Flurry of activity on flickr, and tumblr to come.

All These Things That I've Done in Brandon Flowers' Boots

2010-07-06T18:40:00.000-07:00

much to the horror of some of my friends, ive re-going through my killers phase from elementary/middle school. ("again??" "OH GOD NOT ANOTHER OBSESSION, PLEASE NO!")
i still credit them for being understanding though :)

To explain all this madness and nonsense, I am trying to win Brandon Flowers' (frontman of the Killers) boots. The same ones he wore on their 2009 tour, and in their London ROYAL ALBERT HALL DVD.
I have 30 seconds to show where would I go, what would I do, and why i should win those boots.
I believe he would go to San Francisco, and pass out free flowers on the Golden Gate Bridge because that's just what he would do. My first instinct was to go and find a way to interact with crowds - that's exactly his personality. Of course beforehand, he would have to go to the grocery store and buy some flowers, and dance to Mr.Brightside in the grocery aisle with flowers in hand, à la Morrissey. So now I've had my Morrissey moment and my BF moment too. and of course i dressed up like him, how could i not??

it's in black and white, and anton corbijn/hedi slimane/ kathryn bigelow/sophie muller inspired. i think its coincidental that k's first vid was a new order music video, and the killers got their name from a new order music video, and im making a music video for them now. fate strikes again!

I've been obsessing about brandon flowers' boots and pants for a month now. Every time I watch the killers royal albert hall DVD, I look for the boots and pants. They're absolutely rock n'roll, and perfect. i spent most of friday afternoon (a month ago) looking for combat boots like his - i finally settled on a pair of flowered doc martens

GET THIS. RIGHT AFTER - i go on tumblr for my daily favorite bands fix. someone posted a link to a brandon flowers boots contest that had been announced 5 minutes before i saw the link. i almost had a friggin heart attack. it couldnt be. IT HAD TO BE FATE. what else can explain me spending hours looking for boots JUST LIKE HIS, and then a contest for the real thing is announced just minutes after im done searching? destiny was calling me.. :)
i remember when i had my torn duct taped purple converse, people would tell me that if i wore them to concerts, rock stars would take pity on me and give me shoes.

and of course, like all good stories - this one is connected to the cure. and shoes. because we all know that in reality im an old man existing with a pair of duct taped purple converse for a face.
I went to my first music festival and concert (download festival 07 -she wants revenge, AFI, black rebel motorcycle club, THE CURE!!!) in these shoes. Met: one of my music industry heroes, online cure friends for the first time, new cure friends made on the spot. i wore these in the press pit for 65daysofstatic...JASON COOPER (cure drummer) HUGGED ME WHILE I WAS WEARING THESE SHOES!! the shoes.. its always about the shoes.

so before i start hyperventilating and jumping on my chair (too late for all that), i'd like to thank those who knew of the project and supported me, the rest of the Victims (killers fan club) for welcoming me and lyndsey - the best cinematographer i could ask for.

try to find all the killers references in the vid!

The Trouble With San Francisco (making of the vid pt. 1)
Let's Dance to the Killers @ the Grocery Store (making of pt 2)

Let's Dance to the Killers @ the Grocery Store

2010-07-05T13:51:00.000-07:00

kind of like the wombats’ “lets dance to joy division”, remember that?

The intro to our video (see previous post about The Trouble With San Francisco) has me dancing in the grocery aisle to Mr. Brightside with flowers in hand. I think Mr. Flowers himself would do that.
Just as we were filming mid-dance, a girl from our school and her mom appeared in the background (great timing). So yes, she saw me doing my weird dance with a bunch flowers. in the grocery aisle. No wonder she didn’t say hi… LOL. Anyways, they made it into the vid, kind of.

I STUDIED AND PRACTICED brandon flower’s day and age tour dance moves (ANALYZED THOSE MOVEMENTS, BABY!) in front of a mirror.
then I DANCED THOSE MOVES IN A GROCERY AISLE!!!
just for this video, just for those boots.
Then after our too short trip to San Francisco - that almost ended up as a failure but it was SAVED, on the way home I was torn between the need to pee, falling asleep, and having the blood circulation in my legs cut off by my pants.

all great summer memories really..

The Trouble With San Francisco

2010-07-05T13:48:00.000-07:00

For about the fourth time, I got in trouble while visiting SF. Lyndsey and I were on the Golden Gate bridge Saturday morning to film a video for The Killers (details to come later). My camera woman, Lyndsey, hates heights, so we tried to do this quickly. I was trying to pass out free flowers which was the focus point of the video, but that was kind of difficult because NO ONE wanted free flowers. Wouldn’t even take 10 seconds to hold a flower to film the clip - when i explained it was for an art project. I mean, we weren’t coercing them to rob a bank with us, or selling drugs….

I was disillusioned.

and everyone that actually allowed us to film them taking a flower - were either foreign, or tourists, or both. We only got one original San Franciscan. DAMN SAN FRANCISCANS! i thought it was gonna be like the youtube videos or movies or commericials where it would be so easy….people would take them smiling and happy. IT’S SAN FRANCISCO AFTER ALL!! Apparently, there isn’t much flowery love this summer… as lyndsey would tell me, “how can you be so naive?? LOLOL”
whatever, we’re gonna go back when we’re famous and they’ll all want flowers. In fact, they’ll be giving us flowers, and asking for autographs.
so we didnt do the free hugs thing, because it was hard enough with flowers. there wouldnt be enough room for it in the video anyways, the people we got were just enough to fit in the video time limit.
The first person we asked was the funniest one of the bunch, and the most animated. He waved us off (but with a smile) when we approached him for “free flowers”, but he asked us what it was for. When I told him - art project, he said “ok” in his characteristic Indian accent. He was actually laughing when we filmed the clip. :)

After that we took to introducing our request as for an art project (because “it’s for this Killers contest” would lead to too many complications). This very kind woman volunteered the guy with her, and easily took a flower for the video. They were tourists we had passed by earlier walking on the bridge, and they were so sweet when we asked. I love her, thank you kind woman if you’re out there!

The third stranger featured in the video was a photographer and stopped and allowed us to film when we asked, MUCH TO OUR RELIEF. too much rejection is bad for the heart. :( This is why I was looking out for photographers, they would be more understanding of, “It’s for art..”

We were walking back (still on the bridge and dissapointed) when a man holding his daughter’s hand walking the opposite direction directly in front of us, grabs my attention. He’s one of those people that should be featured on the Sartorialist - long black coat, black cowboy boots, dark sunglasses, and black western hat. I don’t notice the Western tie until I review the footage we shot. How coincidental… this is the same sort of style seen in “All These Things I’ve Done” (which was being used for our video), and the whole Sam’s Town album of the Killers. And both of them were tall - like Killer’s members tall. He’s either Dutch, Belgian or German, European definetly - his accent wasn’t clear because of the wind and we could barely understand what we were all saying because of the darn wind. His daughter and him smile and it’s one of the best scenes we have from that day.

and i got into trouble with security. Apparently youre not supposed to hold signs on the bridge. ironically, i was joking with lyndsey earlier, “LAWL, WHAT IF THEY ARREST US FOR PASSING OUT FREE FLOWERS?”
well, security found me later on the bridge. and he was like “so you were the one holding up the sign earlier? well youre not supposed to do that.. etc. etc. what’s it for anyways?”
“oh its for an art project, im just passing out free flowers”
“ok, well just to let you know, etc. thank you!”
“ok thanks, bye officer!”
he radioed his fellow officers or whatever after that, and said, “i found her - she was just passing out free flowers”
so apparently they were looking for me after they saw me holding up the sign?? but he was smiling the whole time and he was good looking, so it didnt bother me!

I had a vague feeling that I probably shouldn’t have been holding signs up on the bridge. That’s like the fourth time I got into some sort of trouble in SF. Whenever i get that vague feeling of “I probably shouldn’t be doing this,” I go “but lets do it anyways and not get caught.” It’s always been for the sake of ‘art’ though, I SWEAR. Always for stupid, petty things (that i really should know better for) and the situation is always handled with profuse politeness from both sides.

I’m probably gonna be arrested in that city one day! but for a good cause.. like protesting! A friend of mine told me that DJ must stand for delinquent juvenile - haha.

and the people who catch me are always nice.

"Talk Talk" Interview with Gary Biddles (Cure roadie and Fools Dance/Presence frontman)

2010-06-19T15:53:00.000-07:00

It's 5 something in the afternoon and Gary Biddles and I are talking about the FIFA world cup. "Bloody awful," gets thrown alot when I ask him about today's match - draws for the US and England apparently. For those that don't have any idea, Gary Biddles was The Cure's roadie in the early 80s, and later lead vocalist for Fools Dance with Simon Gallup (who formed the band when he left the Cure in 1983) and Presence (with Michael Dempsey and Lol Tolhurst, also of the Cure). And according to his bio, "The first time I sang on stage was at a Cure Christmas party with Robert, Simon, Lol, Steve Severin & Budgie from the Banshees and Frankie Bell. We did "C'mon Feel the Noise" by Slade."

Garry Biddles - backstage, Hammersmith Odeon. April 1984.

His accent isn't as thick as I expected, I can hear that trans American-Britishness (I imagine one would get from living 16 years in California) and according to him, I'm the first one who has. Now he's worried about the American in his accent when he goes back to England. Well I think it's charming. We talk about the ol' UK for a little bit, and I learned that Lol Tolhurst (former Presence bandmate and former keyboardist for the Cure) came stateside soon after he did.

I imagine you keep in touch with Lol?

I just had breakfast and watched the game with Lol today actually.

What about Simon (Gallup)?

I'm trying to go see Simon when I fly back to London. I tried to see him at the Shrine with Lol when The Cure came here, but I could just do the Hollywood Bowl.

How would you compare the American music industry with the European one, especially in the UK?

It's such a big place, it has more outlets. and Americans are more open. They have room for everything in the market - England is more dominated by big bands. Music is more accessible by everybody these days with YouTube and the internet. The media can be more close minded in england, like whatever band of the moment has their front page on the magazine.
I think there is such a huge market in America for all kinds of music, whereas the commercial UK market always seems to be very controlled. I do believe however that most of the best music comes out of the UK.

Most difficult band/artist to work for or with?

I've been lucky enough to have gotten along with everyone, and to have had a good rapport with everybody I've worked with. I would say my own band.

because its more personal?

You can't really run away from yourself, whereas with another person you could say ok and choose not to go with it anymore.

Presence, left to right:

How did Presence and Fools Dance get signed? Fools Dance had a few labels, and Presence was under Smash (Island).

We had various European indie labels pick up the records. Before Smash, we started our own label for Presence - Reality Records under Pinnicle, a UK distribution company. In America, we played some shows and then Smash liked it and signed us.

What were the first few gigs like?

It was kind of scary the first few times. I had sang on a couple occasions with the Cure, so I was a little prepared. With Presence, I was very used to live shows by then. It doesnt scare me performing live.

For Fools dance I must admit I was a bit nervous because of all the hype and pressure but it went really well and after that it was always fun.

Again with Presence there was a huge amount of pressure, more so than before but I had grown in confidence and really felt they were my songs.

Fortunately I have always been blessed with great fans and every show has been exciting and fun.

According to Ron Howe, you were once supported by the Cult. Any recollection of details from that?

I believe that was a misquote! I spoke to Ron the other day.. no, I don't think we ever performed with them. We've played football a few times though! Been on a few teams togethor, but I don't have a recollection of a show.

1983 early Fools Dance promo shot. image courtesy of Picturesofyou.us
Left to right: Stuart Curran, Gary Biddles, Simon Gallup & Matthieu Hartley

Can you tell me what touring was like for Fools Dance, Presence, and The Cure?

Well with the Cure I wasn't performing, so that was different. For each band it was the same group of people - same town, we'd known each other for a long time. The whole thing had that family feeling. It was like a sort of vacation with friends.

Favorite cities?
It's hard to say - all audiences have been really good. Often, there isn't alot of time to spend in the cities to explore when youre touring so you dont get to really know the place. Hmm.. I did like Berlin alot.

During the Fools Dance tour, Ric Gallup did the lighting, correct?

Yes, that was him. Ricky? (mishears me) Oh he'll like that.. I'll have to tell him about that one! (laughs)

Oddest/favorite memory in these 3 bands? I remember Ron howe saying you bought flowers at a gas station on the way to Belgium, and threw them at the audience. I really liked that idea! it reminded me of The Smiths and audiences throwing flowers at Morrissey except it was the other way around in your case..

And that was ways before The Smiths - I take full credit! We were years ahead of them! I remember with Fools Dance the drum kit would be dismantled at the end of each show and thrown around the stage. We were quite an aggressive band.
This would be a whole new interview, gosh from falling off the stage to dismantling drum kits the list goes on. I love playing live though and every one I have played with has always been like family to me. One day we will get into all the crazyness of it all!

And who could forget the "cure are dead" incident in 82?

How did you end up becoming a roadie for the cure? How many years did you do that?

We were friends from way back. So they were gonna go on tour - they were gonna start the 'Seventeen Seconds' tour. I think they took me to the pub to talk about it. So I sold all my records to get some money, and then I followed them on tour. I slept on the floor, all that.. I went to Europe with them. I think I was somewhere around 17, I wasn't working. And then as soon as they started tour in Europe during the 'Picture' tour, their roadie - Click, had to go, and back then they only had one roadie. I was already there, so I became the new roadie. I worked with them from the Faith album up to The Top, which is where I did some promotional television work with them. Somewhere around this time, Fools Dance was formed and I chose to go with Simon.

Who wrote lyrics for Fools dance? Was that something you and Simon shared?

I pretty much wrote everything I sung. He wrote the lyrics for the two songs he sang - one of them was "The Ring." I think Simon didn't want the role of singer, and that's why he asked me to do it.

First Fools Dance gig, left to right: Stuart Curran, Gary Biddles, Simon Gallup

What was working with Lol, Michael, and Porl like? It must've been a unique experience to have Porl play drums on your record.

That was another Paul thompson actually, we called him Tot. He joined after Simon left. Porl did play guitar on a couple Presence songs though. I can't remember if Lol or I talked to Porl about it. We didn't have a guitarist back when Porl played for those songs. Intitially, Michael (Dempsey) played guitar, but then he left. So I played a portion of the guitars until we found someone else.

Can you describe the songwriting processes of Fools dance and Presence and how they differed?

Yes I can! Next question! Just joking. Simon was primarily the music writer, and I wrote the lyrics. Stuart (Curran, guitarist) wrote some as well. With Presence I took on a more musical part of the writing. At first it was me and Laurence (Tolhurst). On the last recording, "Inside" I wrote more music. Lyrically, I did almost all the writing for Fools Dance and Presence.

What were the feelings from the band members when Fools Dance and Inside (1993 Presence album) were released?

I think as with any band its nice to actually put something out. It's alot easier now - you can just download anything from the internet or YouTube. In fact, the other day, I saw on YouTube there was a song of ours (Fools Dance) that I didn't even know had been released! Back then, the only way people could listen to your music was tapes and records.

Why were some songs not released for Fools Dance? Why just EPs?

I don't really know.. its probably because we didn't have enough time. It would've been nice to have more released, but thats just the nature of these things.

What other work have you done after Presence?

I've worked with a bunch of bands on more of a financial side along with some writing. I've done lots of different things but haven't committed to anything. I'm gonna start writing again actually. I might put something out like next summer, it's time. I was doing financial stuff like business management with touring and things of that nature, with Jane's Addiction, Porno for Pyros, Korn, Stevie Nicks. linkin park and the Cranberries. I did a little bit with GusGus for one tour they did in America. Marilyn Manson... nothing shocked me, I'd been through it all with The Cure. I can't remember half the people I've worked with. Oh, I liked Stevie Nicks alot! Right now I'm looking at avenues of what I want to do - I'm reversing - instead of doing something for other people, im looking to do something on my own.

Favorite Presence/Fools Dance/ Cure songs at this moment?

At this point in time, I would think I love "The Kiss" from Kiss Me Kiss Me Kiss Me, and "If Only Tonight We Could Sleep". I love the cover by the Deftones, I think it's one of the best Cure covers I've heard. I can get in modes where I can listen to The Cure all night.. I pretty much like all Cure songs. For Fool's Dance, I like "The Priest Hole". As of right now, "Ocean Hill" and "Closer" are my favorite with Presence.

I was just about to ask you about that one! What was that all about?

If you think about the circumstances of which Simon and I started the band, and listen to the lyrics.. I'll let you work that out. I want people to make their own meanings of of the songs.

as all artists say.

(laughs). Oh really? Then I'll tell you specifically what it's about!

That reminds me of when i would listen to a song, and have these images in my mind, and then I see the music video and it would be nothing like I imagined.

That was the beauty of before the internet - you could lie down and make your own video in your head. Now there's YouTube and you can see a video for everything.

And about "They'll Never Know" - the title track off of the same EP, i loved that.
Jean-Jaques Burnel from The Stranglers played bass on "They'll Never Know". That was also after Simon left.

Towards the end of the call, I'm trying to explain that the published thing won't be word for word - "I'm not sure how interviewers do this, you can't write down every single word everyone says.."

To which Gary replies in that perfectly British punk manner, " Well normally they take the parts they want, and twist the truth so it's nothing like you said. Then we go - you bastards! All you've done is taken out one stupid thing I said and played on that!

Many thanks to Gary Biddles for lending some of his summer afternoon and being a part of this.

make a HOT FUSS

2010-06-06T07:42:00.000-07:00

the song that started it all in 2004. today it has been six years since the album was released

To begin with

2010-06-05T19:28:00.000-07:00

never started a blog before, though ive been reading blogger for years now. Now i have a tumblr, blogspot, twitter, flickr, facebook and myspace. ITS TOO MUCH!!!

the focus will be on street style, and fashion. mostly in san francisco, or on myself. sometimes ill talk about music. no, alot of music. lots of cure.

inspired by a band called the Killers, for their style.